


don't you cry no more

by bk119



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Declarations Of Love, Episode Fix-It: s15e20 Carry On, Episode: s15e20 Carry On, Happy Ending, Internal Conflict, M/M, fix it fic for 15x20, listen it's nearing 4am i have no more mental stability left it all left with this fic, sam's just chillin in the corner silently shippin deancas as they finally get their shit together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:35:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27640808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bk119/pseuds/bk119
Summary: “God. I never thought I’d say this.” Dean takes a deep breath, and lets it out slowly. Cas is gazing at him steadily, and he feels like, once again, those blue eyes can read him entirely too well. “I’m kind of stupidly in love with you, Cas. That’s the truth.”or, a fix-it fic to the series finale. because we all need it.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Implied Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester - Relationship
Comments: 2
Kudos: 68





	don't you cry no more

**Author's Note:**

> it's 2:30am. i've had four breakdowns writing this and also because of the finale. i never thought i'd ever see the show i've watched for six years go down in flames, but they really outdid themselves tonight. jesus shit.
> 
> title from, of course, carry on my wayward son (kansas).

Dean knows he’s dead when he opens his eyes and sees Bobby in front of him. It’s terrifying for a minute, but when Bobby confirms that it’s the Heaven he deserves, he relaxes a little. Even tasting the horrific beer soothes him, bringing back past memories that he never thought he’d reminisce on.

Hearing Bobby tell him that Cas rebuilt Heaven with Jack makes Dean stop in his metaphorical tracks. So Cas is back. Dean refuses to let his mind think about that until he can understand everything that’s going on right now. His mom and dad are down the road, and his friends are down the other. He’s got everyone he wanted in his own version of Heaven, minus two, no, three people. However, one of them is now God, so that one’s going to stay where he is and do his job.

Settling into the car, _Carry On_ _My Wayward Son_ starts playing over the radio, and Dean feels content. It’s just him, his Baby, and his favorite songs for a little bit until he waits for his brother ( _and hopefully, his angel_ , his mind prompts him). He drives, hearing the air whistle as he whips the Impala around the corners just because he can.

As he navigates down the winding road, Dean lets his mind wander a little. He knows that he’s going to see Sam eventually, that it might take a little time, but the missing piece has always been Cas. Back at the house, when he told Bobby that there’s one person missing, it was about Sam, but also wasn’t. It was about the person that’s had his back since he first stabbed him all those years ago. Cas has been by his side, ready to fight and defend since the day they met (well maybe not the _exact_ day they met). Dean can sense the way his body is aching to see Cas in a way that is not exactly foreign to him after all these years of pining silently after the dude, but not knowing when he’s going to see him next is terrifying. Now that he’s in Heaven, he can admit it. Having Cas be a constant the last decade or so has been at least calmed his mind a little, because he had not only his brother, but also Cas ( _who’s so much more than just a friend_ , his mind says) by his side.

(Dean remembers all the times he stayed up at night, thinking of what it would be like to become one with Cas, to kiss him, to lay claim to him, to hear what he sounds like when he’s coming apart. Those times have not stopped in many years, and Dean knows that next time he sees Cas, he has to do something about it.)

Just as that thought comes to a close, Dean drives into an opening. There’s a bridge, with a nice outlook onto a river with luscious green trees that whisper in the slight wind. This is definitely his Heaven, but there’s a couple things missing.

He leans over the side, looking down at the water, watching the small fish flit to and fro as they swim through the currents. He smiles to himself when he senses someone behind him, and he knows it’s Sammy.

Hugging his brother is like a sigh of relief. Even with Cas in his life, Sam has always been important to him. Sam’s been by his side since he was a child and Sam himself was a baby, when the two didn’t know they were going to be bonded for life in more ways than just brotherhood. This is his baby brother, the person he helped raise, who became a wonderful man that Dean is proud of.

Dean senses a second presence as soon as he lets his baby brother go, slapping his back.

This time, it’s the person he’s been waiting to see.

“Hey Cas,” he says, and he’s being pulled into an embrace before he can even get another word out.

“Hello Dean,” Cas says, more gruff than usual, with the remnants of unshed and stifled tears apparent in his voice.

“Where have you been, man?” Dean asks him, because he desperately wants to know why he hasn’t seen him since that fateful night.

“I wanted to give you time to process everything.” Cas answers, but Dean levels him with a look.

Cas grins, albeit shakily. “Alright. I was unsure of how to proceed after our last meeting. I am not sure if you feel the same, but I wanted to let you know it’d be okay no matter what. I am just glad to have you with me.”

Dean smiles back, feeling that his smile is just as shaky but just as genuine. He can see Sammy from the corner of his eye on his phone, so he feels better pretending it’s technically only Cas and him right now.

“God. I never thought I’d say this.” He takes a deep breath, and lets it out slowly. Cas is gazing at him steadily, and he feels like, once again, those blue eyes can read him entirely too well. “I’m kind of stupidly in love with you, Cas. That’s the truth.” He pauses, taking another breath. “I was stunned. The truth is, I’ve loved you for a helluva long time but was too scared to do anything about it. It’s no excuse, but honestly, I was scared about the end of the world and how Chuck had control over everything.”

Cas nods, encouraging him, and Dean continues. “Growing up, I never thought I’d get to be in love properly. I’ve loved before, but you were steady. You were always there, even when you were dead. I’m sorry it took me this long to get my shit together, to the point where I’m in fuckin’ Heaven and you’re back from the Empty.”

Dean can only see pure joy on Cas’ face, no hesitation left whatsoever, and knows that it’s reflecting in his expression too. “I love you, Cas.” He cups Cas’ face in his hands, knowing the parallels of the familiar position would not be lost on the other man.

“I’m so glad to have you back.” Is the response, and Dean leans his forehead against Cas’, unable to erase the smile from his face. The two of them stare into each others’ eyes for a few minutes, and Dean cannot get rid of what he knows is undoubtedly a silly expression on his face. He presses a kiss to the others’ forehead, content with only that for now. Eventually, they turn to face the river once again, and Cas nestles his head into his shoulder, letting out a content sigh. Dean doesn’t think he’s ever felt this happy in his life, and as the wind ruffles his shirt and he can smell the fresh air, he realizes that _this_ is his Heaven, once and for all.

“Okay, okay,” Sam interrupts them, coming over, clapping both of them on the back, clearing his throat. “Let’s get back to Bobby. I want to see Eileen.”

Dean rolls his eyes, but lets his baby brother break Cas and him apart. Sam gives him a side hug and mutters a “congratulations, dude, you deserve this,” quietly, which makes Dean grin widely.

“Hey, so who officiates weddings here? Do ya think Bobby’ll do yours?” Sam asks once they pile into Baby, and Dean groans, berating himself for not expecting the ribbing to start right away.

Cas, in his usual Cas manner, responds with, “I know an officiate down the road from Mary. We could ask her.”

As Dean brings them back onto the road he came down on, he realizes a few things:

  1. He came here with one thing, and left with three. He was alone with Baby, and now he has Baby, Sam, _and_ Cas.
  2. Bobby’s going to laugh at how long it took the two of them to get their shit together.
  3. He’s definitely going to go talk to that officiate down the road sometime soon. They’ve waited too damn long to not start their lives together as soon as possible.



**Author's Note:**

> i kind of left the end up to interpretation. i think they'll be happy here. they got their happy ending. ain't nobody leaving now. 
> 
> thanks for reading! find me on [tumblr](https://sunflouwermoon.tumblr.com/) or [twitter](https://www.twitter.com/hscanyonm)


End file.
